Our morning had been interrupted numerous times by frequent stays in time-out. Partly from the late bedtime the night before, but mostly because I am parenting a two year old, sinner. I had just finished correcting her, yet again, at the lunch table. Through a repentant little voice and spaghetti smeared face, she whispered, "Mommy, you're my favorite, mommy."
My heart melted, obviously. The fact that even after my correcting her, and asking for her forgiveness for my tone in correcting her, she still considers me her favorite. That little voice, with those little eyes, speaking those words made all the minutes of our day spent in time-out worth every second.
I began this day with the ears and eyes of my heart open to God's heart for me, as a mama. In John 16:13-15, Jesus tells us that all He has been given comes from the Father and the Spirit will disclose to us, all the Father has disclosed to the Son. This truth is one I've been mulling in for a few days.
So I've been asking the Spirit to reveal the Father's heart to me as a mama. What is it that God wants more than anything as I parent these sweet ones He's entrusted to me?
Nap time couldn't come quick enough. I was in the baby's nursery, rocking him to sleep. His eyes heavy from the morning activities, with his body cuddled up to mine, he slowly surrendered to rest. The truest form of trust. I laid him down in his crib with one fluid motion and with my best ninja moves, tiptoed across his room and quietly closed the door.
"A daughter," He said. "My heart for mamas, is to be a daughter first."
If I'm honest, it's not what I was expecting. But the more the Spirit revealed, the more it made perfect sense.
When I walk in my identity as daughter, I have an inheritance and influence. I know who I am and can operate my day and circumstances through that lens of knowing I am His. What others say about me, pale in comparison to His thoughts of me. But the best part of being daughter, is having access to the Father.
Parenting is no joke. We are propelling hearts into the next generation. And everyone has an opinion about how it should be done. Most days, I have no idea what I'm doing. I lay my head on my pillow at night and beg God to cover all of the day's mistakes in grace. Then there are some days, though few and far between, I watch her serve her brother, or hear her talking to God like a friend. And my heart explodes, because maybe, just maybe, she's seeing Him more than me.
God's heart for us, mamas, is for Him to be known by us. When we know Him, we start talking like Him, acting like Him, looking like Him, and loving like Him. When we parent as daughters, we shepherd out of the abundance of our access to Him. He knows all things and we have access to all He knows.
Finding Him in the hidden, making space in our minds for Him to speak, prioritizing time in our day to make deposits of the Word into our hearts, all of these things are the best ways we can serve our children.
Knowing Him, in all His fullness, is God's heart for you today, mama.
Because when you know Him, your children will know Him in you.