Families Don’t Have to Match
I glanced in the mirror one night when I was putting by children to bed and suddenly remembered that I didn’t grow them in my belly when I saw our reflection staring back at us. It might sound weird that I forget that my children are adopted, but I do.
Because to me, they’re just my children.
How I Pray for My Children
When I was 16, I went down an aisle during a mission’s conference and told Jesus I would follow Him to the ends of the earth, I said “yes” to go wherever He said to go. I thought back then that looked like a remote village in Africa, with children from the orphanage all piled up in my lap, and red dirt covering my clothes. And while my heart beats wildly for those children, my mission field is in my living room.
I was wiping bottoms one day and sweeping goldfish off the floor, and God reminded me of that fall day all those years ago, when I said yes to Him. And I realized I didn’t have to go to the nations to mother the vulnerable, I was staring them right in the face.
The New Year’s Goal You Can’t Mess Up
Go ahead. Tell me all the reasons I should make them. I know, I know. But just hear me out.
Here’s the deal. I used to be a perfectionist until God set me free. I used to find pieces of my identity in what I could accomplish, what I could create, what I could produce. I would strive and work and strive and work. I would make unattainable goals and when I would happen not to accomplish them, feel like a total failure.
I was either finding my identity in the working towards the goals or the failure of not attaining them. Always feeling unsatisfied, and honestly really, really tired.
And then I started having revelation on my true identity, who God says I already am.
Looking Back
2018 was so beautiful.
We started 2018 with a deep sadness. So much disappointment was felt in 2017 and our foster son that had been with us for six months left very abruptly. But we welcomed 2018 with full hearts, expectant of all God had for us. We heard Him say this year would be a year of harvest. And we definitely saw that. It was beautiful. We saw the first fruits of all the good seed we have been sowing for so many years. It was a year I’ll deeply cherish.
Selah Turns Five
She turned five today. Five.
Five whole years loving a miracle. Five whole years of so much joy. Five whole years of being a mama.
Five feels hard. I say this every year, but for real. She might as well be driving. Hold me, Jesus. She’ll go to KINDERGARTEN next year. I can’t take it.
The Garden
The Garden is serving someone you know.
It’s the girl sitting on the same row with you each Sunday. She’s the girl in the next cubicle over. The cousin you love but only see a few times a year. The teacher who pours out her life into your child. The lady sitting on your board. The woman on the other end of the conference call. The girl on your worship team.
It’s her.